Happy Easter everyone!
2 Easter Sundays ago, at around 3:00 AM, I was brought to the hospital. I was about to give birth. Like what I have mentioned in my previous posts, it was such a long day labor. I was in the Delivery Room at 6:00 AM. While waiting, all I could do is look at the wall clock, thinking, wishing that it’s already 8:00 PM or 11:00 PM because I thought, it will be over by then.
I was praying, talking to God during the labor process. I was asking for strength so I could endure the pain. I am the type of person who have a low tolerance of pain. Although I can tolerate the painful contractions, I can’t stand the lower back pain. The lower back pains were caused by the pressure of the baby’s descent through the pelvis.
Why can’t I tolerate such pain? I thought I was ready for that, having read some what to expect when you’re expecting books and other articles about giving birth. It’s still different when you’re already there, when you’re feeling the pain. Being a first time mother, I didn’t expect that the back labor was terrible! The pressure in my back were so intense!
Finally it will be over as the resident OBs decided to have an emergency CS. I was transferred to the Operating Room before 12:00 NN. My OB consultant, who performed the CS, came at half past 2. Sean was born at 3:07 PM. While I was being transferred to the Recovery Room, I heard one of the doctors mentioned that the baby was facing up towards my pubic bone that’s why his head have not engaged although at 8:00 AM I was already 8cm dilated. His ‘facing up’ position caused the harder part of his skull to rest on my pubic bone that’s why I felt a constant lower back pain.
And going back (again) to the time when I was still waiting for Sean to be born, when I was ‘complaining’ about the pain, I realized it’s Easter Sunday. While praying, I told myself that the lower back pain I am complaining is a normal labor pain that won’t last forever. It’s painful and agonizing for me, but it’s nothing compared to what Jesus went through when He died on the cross to save me from my sins – the times I lied, hated, cheated, had bad thoughts and other sins only God knows what else. He endured all the pain and agony so my sins will be forgiven. He died on the cross and rose again from the dead to pay for my sins.
I don’t know, I’m not really a religious person, I don’t even know what religious means. I am even guilty of not going to church every Sunday. I don’t even remember the last time I prayed the Rosary. But I pray every day, every night especially when I go to sleep. When I pray, I thank God for all the blessings, I ask for forgiveness of all my sins, I ask for protection that all my loved ones will be safe and away from all the dangers.
I remember last year around January, I received a phone call from someone who said she’s from TCT, and that she called because she wanted to pray for me. I asked her how she got my number, she said from PLDT’s directory. She asked what’s my religion and I said Roman Catholic. She also asked If I already have accepted Jesus as my Saviour and I said Yes. “Since when? You should remember the date”. I don’t know the exact date or time, but I know I already have accepted Jesus as my Lord and Saviour. I told her what I know of Jesus, that He died on the cross to save me. That Jesus was sent by God not for the “saints” or the “holy” ones but for the sinners, like me. I believe it is through the grace of our Lord Jesus that we are saved.
I also shared with her about a former classmate who asked me “if you were to die today, where will you go, heaven or hell?” My answer to her then was, “I would want to be in heaven, but I am a sinner and we all know sinners go to hell.” I know my answer then was different than my views today. If I would answer the same question now, it’s totally different. For now, I can boastfully say, Yes I am a sinner and I deserve to go to hell, but I believe in Jesus Christ, and that He died on the cross to pay for my sins and save me from the fires of hell. Whoever believes and accepts Jesus will have eternal life, and that is God’s free gift.
The caller said she’s happy to know that I have such a great faith on Jesus. She said she’ll be saying a prayer and she wants me to pray with her, and that I should remember that date (January 16) as the date when I was “born-again”, when I received Jesus as my Saviour.
Tags: personal, life, Jesus, reflection, faith, inspirational, labor back pains
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